WHY I TALK SEX

I was born and brought up in Brazil, where women are hyper-sexualisedWe now live in a society that is aware that women everywhere fall victim to sexual harassment, sexual abuse and rape. But unfortunately, the Brazilian culture is one of those that encourages the normalisation of this sort of behaviour.

At the age of 6, boys at school would call me sexy. I hated it, and I  would punch any boy that said I  was “pretty” or “sexy”. In the end  though, I was always the one that  got into trouble with the  headteachers; “they’re just complimenting you, is all. It’s a nice thing. You can’t punch people for complimenting you. The  headteachers would say to me –  yes, “headteacherS” plural, as this  happened in more than one school.

Ok, yes, physical violence wasn’t  the best way for me to deal with this unwanted attention but telling a little girl that she should ignore her feelings and feel lucky to be called “pretty” or “sexy” by her peers, is not right; it is dangerous and harmful. Eventually, I came to believe that if I fought against those comments, then I was wrong and I’d get in trouble for it.

At the age of 10, for a period of 5 months, I was sexually abused by an uncle. Then, in my teens, I moved from Brazil to London, and I experienced more sexual abuse; I was groped and felt up by some of the boys at school. I quickly learned that people’s assumptions are that Brazilian women have lots of sex and love any physical contact.

I am disgusted by unwanted male attention – it is UNWANTED – and I was vocal about it at school, which resulted in my peers calling me “frigid”. 

This story was orginially posted unapologeticallyelly.com

Image credit: Faby and Carlo

Jannette Davies

Co-founder of Scarlet Ladies, featured on Channel 4 Super Orgasm andmainly on my usual quest to empower women, normalise the conversation around female sexuality whilst going through my own personal journey of sexual empowerment. Can't find me? I am probably enjoying my me time with the metal one. 😉

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